Change can spin our tails around in furious unknown circles.
Or it can gloriously grab tight to our ankles and gift us firm footing - even in the midst of the swirling and whirling of it’s nature of unfamiliar.
Dawn broke.
The alarm sounded like golden razors to my ears. It’s a beautiful morning both from the breath-pausing sunrise and the new beginning of a new job. It’s the day we’ve been planning for, waiting for, expectant of - for far more years than many knew. It’s the day that countless prayers and pleads to our God collided with a fresh start of tangible blessing.
Steamy shower-room wafted sweet smells through our humble home. I, sitting on our crisp, white couch facing the window that grants us peace of fields, open the Word praying for truth to jump off the pages and breathe new life into our new life here. Into this new chapter.
The ironed clothes were fixed perfectly on his strong body, the new belt fastenened, the hairs all in place, and I, with a gaze of wonder, starred into my perfectly imperfect man’s eyes and reassured him that today was a day that he is worthy of.
Because God called him to it. Because God orchestrated it. Because God.
We nestled on that crisp, white sofa with the living bread in my hand and the physical fueling bread in his, and I read Jeremiah 1.
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”
We marveled at the knowing that God knows us, just as he knew Jeremiah. He formed us - formed you - with a living hand that guides only with purpose and care.
We read forward soaking in the familiar passages, filled with a new sense of child-like wonderment as if we’d never scanned these word with our hearts in past…
“Alas, Sovereign LORD,” I said, “I do not know how to speak; I am too young.”
Jeremiah’s honesty is the same honesty that pours out of us when we face something bigger than us. The new change brings old feelings of inadequacy and a wondering of our worth. Are we capable? Are we able? Can we stand under the weight of the change of it all?
Will I fail?
Hand in hand we candidly processed the realness of the real fears that can shake us and immobilize us.
Suddenly, our eyes see the verses that follow. Struck with awe we breathe-in God’s perfect way of responding with the old words that never lose trend…
“Do not be afraid.”
Oh how our souls need us to re-plant this root deeper than any fear.
Because the God of the universe spins and weaves us together with the unshakeable truth that fear is a liar. It is only when we’ve grown from our youth that we hear the voice of the world louder. The one that says we aren’t enough. But the venom of fear is no match for God’s truth.
The antidote of fear is God.
The antiserum is love.
“Get yourself ready! Stand up and say to them whatever I command you. Do not be terrified by them, or I will terrify you before them. Today I have made you a fortified city, an iron pillar and a bronze wall to stand against the whole land - against the kings of Judah, its officials, its priests and the people of the land.”
Having humbled ourselves before the throne of God, humility is what we prayed. A leader must be humble. Therefore, my man must be humble as he leads in this new place. Leading well means taking the cue from the man who leads our souls into eternity. Pouring out wisdom and discernment means soaking in wisdom and discernment from the source. And so we prayed that he would say what he is commanded infused with abundant grace. As honey drips from the honeycomb may my groom drip life through his leadership.
So grateful for this job, for this season in life, my man stood up with a courage that makes my knees weak and my heart swoon. There he stood, ready to walk out the door a warrior in the army of God. There is no safer place for a wife than to stand tucked under the leadership of a husband who is lead by Jesus.
“Do not be afraid.”
At there it is. The promise that makes change feel like possibility. The promise that takes ordinary men and women and births them extraordinary.
That promise is for you sweet friend. When change comes. When possibility arrises. When the future shifts and God calls you deeper - the promise “Do not fear.” gives you wings to confidently respond…
Yes.
I Will Go.
Stand tall by falling to your knees and praise the one who formed you, who goes before you, and who appoints and anoints those he calls.
I tip-toed my tickling toes to the door and stared out the tiny peep-hole meant to give a glimpse of what’s outside our four walls of home. I watched his sway as he walked to his car. Amazing. Pure joy is a wife’s heart when her husband walks straight into the will of God. The good, perfect, will of God.
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Going Deeper
1. What new thing is God calling you to today, or this season?
2. How has fear paralyzed you?
3. Recount three times you took a leap of faith and God was faithful.
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