A Mere Reflection: 5 things to consider on Good Friday

It is Holy week. It is a sacred week in which I have little words to do it justice. When we are standing at the cross of Jesus and reflecting on the greatest sacrifice, it is hard to feel put together or self-righteous because I for one, am completely humbled and broken before our Holy God. I've made the mistake a few times of calling today Black Friday. Kind of funny and so wrong, I know. But after thinking about it, it fits doesn't it? It was the darkest day filled by the darkest hours that defines Good Friday.

Every year at this time God gives me a few fresh things to think on. He takes this story and makes it new for me in a different way. It doesn't matter that I have read it and heard it for the past 27 years, there is layer upon layer of His Holiness that will never be fully known to us this side of Heaven. The Word is alive! As Isaiah 40:8 says, "The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the Word of our God endures forever." This story is not new news to most of us, but would you pause with me to consider what He is asking me to process this year? My prayer is that you too may hear the gospel in a fresh ,new way.

 

1) Holy. A name, a word, a description of the one true God. How can it be that this Holy, perfect God with all power, the God who can change anything in an instance allows us to be a part of His story. I was thinking about the blood moon that happened this week. Here we, humans, are on earth thinking we have it all figured out. Science and astronomy and all the other smart people that have studied the sky knew the fine details of when the moon would be shadowed by earth, what color would appear, what time it would take place. We were given these details because, well, they just knew. But the thing is, God only allows us to have knowledge of the things He allows us to have knowledge of. What I mean is that our Holy God could have simply shifted the moon or the earth ever so slightly to stop it all from happening. For goodness sakes He could have just placed his thumb in front of the moon preventing us from seeing anything. And yet, he didn't. He is so sweet and loving to us that He allows us the comfort of having the things that we come to expect and know as true. He keeps the earth rotating and stars placed where we can study them. He keeps the sun rising and setting at specific times in our day so that we can have a small sense of order and control here on earth. And yet in Isaiah 66:1 God tells us that Heaven is his throne and the earth is His footstool. Clearly, the God who is unimaginably bigger than us could change all the things we think we know in an instance, but He doesn't. That is worthy of standing in awe and wonder and being humbled by this great, Holy God who loves us enough to allow us the comfort of constants on earth.

2) Complete. Last night I hopped in my car and drove to church so I could sit in God's house praying and taking communion while reflecting on the events of Maundy Thursday. When I went up to the communion table our pastor had me dip the piece of bread in my little juice glass and eat it. There was still juice left so he directed me to, "Finish it off." Although I don't think my pastor meant anything spiritual by saying that little phrase, it pierced me and stuck glued to me until even now. I don't know quite how to describe it but I'll try. As I've been processing this, two pictures come to my mind. First, God chose the only way to fully, completely make a way for us to be with him and commune with Him. Sin separated us from Him and He loved us enough to choose a way that meant only reconciling us to himself one time. He didn't do a little something and then say, "oops, let's try that again" or choose to have a series of things that would pave the way to eternity with Him but instead He did the one and only possible thing that could fully and completely transform our eternity. He finished it off. It's mind blowing to think of how much He loves us. Secondly, it was painful for me to drink the rest of that juice. I know it was just juice but it represents the blood of Jesus. My savior. The perfect lamb that was slain for me and you. How could I have done this? How could I drink the rest of his blood? Wasn't just a little enough? Couldn't I just have a taste?! But NO. God gave every last ounce of His son to us. He allowed all of His blood to be shed for us. His whole body was given to us. I picture Jesus hanging on the cross dripping blood and saying, "It's all yours sweet children. My beloved ones, don't allow a drop to hit the ground. Drink in eternal life. You need all of me." And so we do. We have to fully receive Him and the fullness of what He did for us. Part of the miracle is that we continue to have full access to Him and who He is. He does not withhold anything-not even a drip.

3) We cannot will salvation into our lives any more than we can will spring to come. One of the many things God is helping me understand more is that I have a tendency to slip into a works religion mentality. Even though I know that I cannot earn salvation and I cannot earn favor with God, I find myself doing things to try to earn His love and affection (*see Romans 3 to read more about that). I wish I didn't have this fault but when I recognize it, He helps me re-center on the truth that I cannot earn anything from God. He gave freely. His sacrifice was grace in full and there is nothing I have or can do to earn that. I just have to receive. I was recently listening to a sermon by Timothy Keller in which he talked about how our sin nature leads us to this cycle of grasping and receiving the truth that we cannot earn salvation or favor with God but then we slip right back into works religion thinking we need to be about doing instead of receiving. It makes me think of how we Minnesotans like to wear flip flops starting the day that the calendar says it's Spring. Even though, it's like 40 degrees out and we just got bombed with a huge snow storm. We know it's cold but we are stubborn and determined to will spring to come by dressing the part. Yeah, it doesn't work that way. We might as well keep covered and stay warm until the right time comes to peel off layers.

4) Being held by the cross. It seems impossible to consider that while Jesus was on the cross, He was able to hold us. He was suffering having been beaten and nailed to a wood cross. And yet we know that this God, our mighty savior, is able to hold us even as we lay before Jesus' feet and consider His sacrifice. As His blood was poured onto us, for us, He was still able to hold us and call us to Himself. In fact, the image of the cross is the very thing that should call us to Himself and trust that He is love. Isaiah 40:11 says, "He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young." Tending to sheep meant watching over them closely to protect from harm, it also meant meeting their needs of food and water and care all while enduring longs days and nights. It took a devoted, loving shepherd to be with his sheep. That is the savior we serve. He wants to hold us close to His heart. He gathers us and carries us. Casting Crowns has a new song called Just be Held that talks about letting go and allowing God to hold you. Today, I feel that way. I am so overwhelmed with the reality of the crucifixion that I feel as though God is holding me. The very God that gave everything for me understands that I am not strong enough on my own to even grieve for what He did for me. So He holds us.

5) Jesus gave thanks on the night He was betrayed. Author Ann Voskamp wrote this yesterday on her Facebook page:

"For the Thursday of #PassionWeek: There are no words... the verse that chokes up and changes a life:
" 'And on the night He was BETRAYED...
He broke bread & lifted it up & GAVE THANKS.'
If Jesus can give thanks *in that*?
I can give thanks in everything."

I can hardly add much to that except YES! A thousand times over yes! If Jesus gave thanks on the night He was betrayed and abandoned while He faced His darkest hours, then I too can give thanks in all circumstances.

I've been singing the doxology over and over the past two days. My desire for us is that whether we are headed to church tonight, going out with friends or enjoying a quiet night at home, we will pause to praise the one and only God who has saved us and allowed a way for us to be with Him in eternity.

Praise God, from Whom all blessings flow;
Praise Him, all creatures here below;
Praise Him above, ye heavenly host;
Praise Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

In awe of our Savior,
Chels


Casting Crowns has another great song called Follow Me  that is worth listening to. "Just follow me." That's all that Jesus wants of us.

Traveling the Dark Valleys: What SNOW and SORROW have in common

Spring had finally come, or so I thought. The grass had a few scattered patches of green and the sun was warming the earth in a way we hadn't felt for so many months I've lost count. I was relieved that finally we were exiting the black hole Minnesotans refer to as winter.

Then the storm came. Literally. The news anchor, bless his heart, announced that we were about to be hit with a big ole' snow storm with totals that could reach 12" or more. Please no. No. No. No. Please no. This was the sound coming from each Minnesotan who has endured yet another long Minnesota winter. We are weary. We are saddened by the white stuff and we just want spring to come, back. It was here. It really was. Then the evil snow fairies returned and dumped their stored up load on us, once again.

You may be wondering where I am going with this. I mean, after all you are clearly aware of the recent snowfalls. In fact, you are likely just as sick of hearing about it as I am. We would rather close our eyes and pretend it's a bad dream and wake up to our fairytale of a full blown spring day with birds chirping and the sun raising our dead lawns to life. Well, I do have a point and it's more than just talking about this ugly beautiful snow.

Seasons in life. Not a new phrase to most of us. We hear it often and assume there will be a good lesson taught about the different seasons we face and why they are important. I am here to say that some seasons, like winter, can really suck. Some seasons are so painful and mind numbing that you feel as if you are being drug through it just praying at some point you'll come out alive on the other side. I'm speaking from my own experience and also as someone who has a front row seat to watch some very dark seasons play out in the lives of people I love right now.

This morning at about 9:00, once the snow was done falling, I mouthed the following sentence to my 2 and 3 year old girls, "Come on girls, let's get outside quickly while the baby is napping so we can shovel the driveway for daddy before she wakes up". They excitedly put their gear on and we headed out the door ready to conquer the white mess covering our driveway.  When I first started on the sidewalk leading up to our house I thought to myself, "hey, this isn't bad at all. It's light and fluffy snow so I should have the driveway done in no time!" I was hopeful, excited even. My goal in shoveling the driveway was to ease the burden on my husband. He has a lot on his plate right now and I wanted to do a small thing to serve him in hopes it would bless his day by taking something off of his 'to-do' list. I know it doesn't seem like much but I'm learning that when it comes to serving my husband, it's the little day-to-day things that are the richest, most meaningful in our marriage. One big sacrifice is honorable, daily sacrificing is choosing selflessness every hour despite the piles of laundry, demanding toddlers and looming tasks that seem to suffocate me. Love is daily. Its not just one memorable moment.

I finished the sidewalk and set out to start on our driveway. It took (approximately) a whole 27 seconds for me to realize that this was not a small task and I was crazy to think I could complete this in such a short amount of time. Depressing. Defeating. Overhwhelming. It was at this point that I realized there must be more to this project then just blessing my husband. I started conversating with God about the difficult seasons some of my family and friends are facing. Trying to wrap my head around it all. So much pain and discouragement. Some of which had nothing to do with their own choices but rather things that were done to them. How does someone overcome this, God? How do I even help them wade through these deep waters? Things were going so well and then bam the storm hit! Then I heard him speak to me softly that there are times, as is true with my friends, that we begin our journey in the light, fluffy snow. We think that this challenge is not going to be that challenging afterall and we've got this. Shovel after shovel we begin to uncover and expose the lies and hurt for what they are. But the deeper we dig we begin to see that there is actually a whole lot more work to do and stuff to face then we initially realized. And.it.feels.daunting.
 

The sweat was starting to form on my back as I made pass after pass slowly chipping away at the mountain of snow on our driveway. Our sweet neighbors came over to play with my little ones which helped so much. Not only are they a joy to be around but they have little 'mothering' hearts that like to watch over my 2 year old which freed me up to focus on the task at hand. At one point I decided to walk to the end of our driveway to clear up the big pile leftover from the snowplow coming by. Unfortunately this was wet, heavy snow. Nothing like the light, fluffy stuff on the rest of the driveway. It was back breaking and about twice as deep. At this point I was sure I was not going to finish the driveway today. I felt deeply disappointed because I so desperately wanted to get this done for my well-deserving husband. I was sure I had failed him. When I couldn't muster up any more strength to hoist that heavy shovel over my shoulder, I took a break from the end of the driveway and started back up the side where the weight was less and I could breathe a little easier. I was aching and my back felt like a thousand needles were poking it but I knew I had to continue on. The light, fluffy stuff actually felt like a breeze compared to the other and I was relieved to be working on it. This is true of our trials. We may start climbing up the mountain and hit some heavy, wet spots that we swear will break us. It's during those times that we lose steam; feeling exhausted, out of breath, worn out and convinced that we will lose our battle. It seems impossible to continue on and we know we have two choices. We either forge ahead and hold onto the hope that somehow we will make it or we give up. Most of the time we forge ahead and we find that what we thought was breaking us before, the light and fluffy snow, is actually now the easy stuff. Somehow in our struggle we grew stronger. What was overwhelming when we started up our mountain is now easy and we are grateful for the wet, heavy snow that made us stronger and appreciate the lighter load that once weighed us down.

I continued on even though I was struggling. I was so tired. I even slipped on ice and fell at one point which caused my girls to run up to me concerned with whether I was okay. I reassured them that I was fine and I was going to push on and complete our project. It was at this point that they started getting restless. They begged me to go to the backyard to play on the 'mountain' which is a fun hill right behind our house. I felt God nudging that it was time for a lesson, for both them and me. I kneeled down and looked into their big pretty blue eyes and said, "girls, I know you want to play on the mountain in the backyard. I do too. That sounds like more fun than shoveling. But God calls us to serve each other out of love so that we can show Christ' love to each other. I believe that by shoveling the driveway for daddy, we are serving him the way God wants us to. I know it's not easy but sometimes we have to give up what we want so that we can do what God asks us to. God will reward you for honoring him." My 3 year old, Charlotte, started crying and pleading with me to take her to the backyard. In that moment, out of shear exhaustion and the honest plea of a mothers heart, I prayed "God please help their little souls and minds understand the importance of this. Speak to them in a way they can get it". Just then, Charlotte stopped crying and she said, "Mama look! There's a mountain right here we can play on". Praise God! I know she tucked that little lesson into her heart somewhere and in God's great Mercy He showed my girls that although they couldn't have what they really wanted, He would give them something good. The irony? It was sitting right there the whole time. They didn't see it until they took their focus off of what they thought was the best thing.

I continued shoveling. I prayed for God to somehow allow me to finish this huge task quickly. Working hard with no breaks for what seemed like forever, I finally decided to look up and survey the damage. When I saw how little I had left I couldn't believe it, I was almost done! The sun had started shinning and I felt victory close by. I knew I only had a few more minutes and I would be completely done and able to just enjoy knowing how it would bless Jake. All because God faithfully answered my prayer. He kept my mind and heart busy with the things He was teaching me and He gave me physical strength to finish. He even gave my girls enough patience and understanding to support me. I thought of how there will come a time when we begin to see the light breakthrough in those difficult seasons. It may be a slow, creeping in or it may be a burst but it will come and when it does, it is the taste of complete rescue and victory.

In a season of life in which God has been calling Jake and I to take big steps in obedience, we have faced a lot of trials and we're starting to see how our family is along for the ride, facing those trials together. Sometimes that's hard to watch. It takes sacrifice to walk up the mountains and overcome the struggles. When we pray, "God use me, mold me, make me more like you", He will answer by doing just that. Just last night Jake and I talked about how when we pray that we don't always realize what we're asking but we're focused on the eternal value of growing in our faith. Then when it gets hard, we're tempted to beg God for a way out, not even thinking that if we truly want the end result then we have to push through the whole season or we will miss out on what could have been done. We will not get the full reward if we bow out early. Our dark valleys and mountains of trials are not easy to understand. I will not pretend to have an answer of "why" for any of it. But what I do know is that God rewards us for our obedience of persevering and pushing forward. He will meet us at every turn, even in the darkest of times, He never leaves us. We may not feel Him there, we may not even see him there, but He is. He is with us and He is with our family. Whether it is something we face because we are choosing to follow Jesus or something we face because life is plain hard on this earth and we are going to face alot of junk. Like my Charlotte's little mountain, He will also give us sweet hope and pleasure along the way. It may not be the big, fun hill in the backyard but it is still so good if we can just open our eyes to see it.

Perseverance is defined as this, "Steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success". That is what this morning felt like for me. It may have just been shoveling snow but I truly had to persevere to complete it. It's also what it feels like when we are facing trials and dark valleys. There are many verses in the Bible that reassure us of God 's love and faithfulness through difficult times. Here are just a few...

Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.  For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing. James 1:2-4 (NLT)

God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. James 1:12 (NLT)

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. Psalm 34:18 (NLT)

I often say that when our friends and family are sitting in the trenches and enduring heartache, my role and my desire is to sit with them and allow them space to just be there, processing and mourning and feeling every ounce of the weight of where they are. Naturally, I want to fix it and jump to the next phase by helping them overcome and see the hope but I'm learning that that will come and I will help them with that when they get there. I just need to be there for each step along the way. The darkness will pass and when it has then we get to rejoice together that what once was hope is now what we are living out.

In love,
From one weary traveler to another,
Chels