The sinners {like me} daily journey from empty to full

I sat paging through years of journal entries reflecting on seasons gone past. Some marked with joy, others with sorrow. And some, as in recent months, marked with a hunger to be pieced back together. 

A hunger to be poured into my empty places. 

If you've ever felt broken and in need of wholeness you are in common company. 

Every day I long for more. I come to the Lord each morning hungry for wholeness. Before the sun rises I sit by candlelit with my Bible and journal in hand asking my Father to piece me together, again. 

Some days he offers a quick refill to overflowing and I move on with my day with joy. 

But I'm a work in progress and in deep need of my Savior. So other days, seasons, years, He gently leads me to finding His repair of my brokenness through a longer journey in His Word of wholeness. 

Those like me who have wandered the wilderness a time or two looking and searching, know that often the key to walking into the promised land is belief. 

Do I believe God is who He says He is? Do I trust Him?

His Word will always lead us to the truth that pulls us through the wilderness. 

The woman in John chapter 4 reminds me of so many of us. Wandering, longing, needing Jesus more. 

The Samaritan woman meets Jesus at the well. She comes to draw water at an hour of the day that buys her freedom from judging eyes because she knows the good christian women would have already come and gone for their daily water draw. 

Lord have mercy on us for being the judging eyes on the broken ones around us when we too are just as broken and in need of you. 

She comes with a jar because she is in need of a fill to satisfy her thirst. Only she does not expect to find more than physical satisfaction. 

Oh how often I come to the well not even knowing how desperately I need more than what I come for.

Jesus is sitting, waiting for her. He knows the hour she’ll come and He sees her longings. 

So He waits. 

Because our Jesus does not call upon us until He has waited upon us. Because Jesus love us so much to allow us to come to Him when we’re ready.

He asks her for a drink. “How can you ask me for a drink?” she responds (vs 9).

She is a sinner. A Samaritan who is looked down upon. He is a Jew. Looked upon as higher, more holy. 

Except she doesn't know that He, the Lamb of the world has come to serve not to be served. He has come to set Her free. 

He has come to set us all free.

He asks her for water not because He needs her to give it to Him but because He chooses her.

He sits in the heat of the day, tired from His journey and we see in the Scripture that He takes the time to talk with her. To let her know that He knows her. He sees her. Her sin is not hidden from Him. 

And still He chooses her. 

"Jesus replied, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again. But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.” “Please, sir,” the woman said, “give me this water! Then I’ll never be thirsty again, and I won’t have to come here to get water.”" vs 13-15

He offered everything she will ever need to be whole and free and live without condemnation of sin.  

Living Water. 

She begged Him for the living water He spoke of. As if all she needed was a quick transaction to repair her broken life.  

Jesus in His gentleness wouldn't allow that. He wants more for her. 

He wants more for you and me. 

He desired Her to know Him. To feel the pulse of His grace over her life. To see the warmth of His smile as a reflection of His forgiveness. To feel the freedom that His blood would purchase for Her. 

I can feel her exhaling in defeat when He calls out her sin. (vs 16-17) He knew her sin. I can feel her burning thought, is my chance at receiving this Living Water gone because now He really knows me?

And you and I can relate to this, I think. The wondering if Jesus will really offer what He says He can once He sees what our hands and our hearts and our hands have done.  

Then hope breaks through with these words in verse 21, “Woman,” Jesus replied ,”believe me,” 

He continues with a promise of a future where all will worship in Spirit and in truth. 

It's there we hear Him saying - when we most need hope is when we most need to worship him.

Worship takes our eyes and points to the life giver of the Living Water and reminds us that He chose us while we were yet sinners. Not because of us, but because of Him. 

He doesn't want us to reach out a dirty hand begging for a small portion in a single transaction. He wants our eyes off of wondering why He would be so good to us so that He can fix our eyes on the truth that He is good to us.  

He beckons us to come as all that we are. 

Sin seen. Broken bared. Hurt Heard. Vulnerable hearts in need of a Savior. 

And receive the fullness of Himself for eternity over and over and over again. 

Here his voice calling to you - 

I give myself to you over and over and over and over and over and over again. 

Never ending. The well never dry. For I pour my blood and my heart and my soul out for you and into you for all of eternity.

Bring your jar to me and allow me to fill it overflowing. Cracked and chipped and worn. Watch your jar come to life as a new creation in me. 

I will wait at the well for you. I will call upon you in love and grace and mercy when you come. I will show you your sin and offer you forgiveness in the same breath. Come to me for what only I can give you. I long to give to you. 

I choose you. 

Will you choose me? 

Will you worship me alone?

Oh for glory that He gives us Himself.

The Living Water to overflow our empty jars. 

Today, tomorrow and always. 

Are You Questioning Your Life? If You're Willing Dear Friend, Your Adventure Lies Where You Are

It was a last minute decision to make a quick stop at the large chain store. 

Just before we turned onto the highway, my husband saw the big blue department store sign and remembered he needed some car supplies. I offered to sit in the truck with our three little ones to wait. Truth be told, I just felt too heavy hearted to be lost in a sea of people that morning. 

Sitting there with my thoughts, I tossed and turned inside myself wondering at things that might never have answers. It’s wrestling with the why - what - where kind of questions that tend to lead me to surrender in my faith.

Why am I here?

Why did I give up on that dream?

What am I doing with my life?

Should I be doing more?

Lost deep in heavy thought, I barely noticed my husband who slipped into the seat beside me until I heard the swish and swoosh of the plastic bag holding his purchase.

We rounded the corner of the parking lot and as I flicked on the blinker, I noticed her. A middle aged woman standing in the snowbank on the corner of the busy intersection. With only a two-foot section of ground cleared off, she stood shaking on her little snow peninsula. 

Her sign read, “Trying to get home. Anything will help. God Bless.”

Divinely orchestrated, traffic was at a dead stop. The pause in cars allowed a pause in my heart. I starred at her and studied her as if she was a piece of beautiful art I wanted to understand. She weakly stood wearing old worn tennis shoes, tattered jeans, and a light spring jacket over a sweatshirt that stretched above her mouth to keep the cold from her neck. It was twenty-two degrees and breezy that day. 

She’s cold, I thought to myself. She’s…cold. 

For a moment I am ashamed to say that my jaded, bitter, cold-hearted, privileged, American, attitude began to whisper doubts. Did she really need the money to get home? Was she really that desperate?

I snapped out of my pondering trance just in time to hear God remind me…”Open your eyes, your heart, to see what she really needs.”

She’s cold, I pondered as I watched her shiver. 

“Will you give her the coat off your back?”  God whispered loudly to my soul.

Without taking my eyes off of her, I began to speak to my husband in a slow voice that resembled someone in shock. 

“She’s cold honey. She’s really cold. I think I need to give her my coat.” And without another thought I put our truck in park, right in the middle of stopped traffic, and began to hop down to the ground. Jake handed me some money and I jogged over to her while unzipping my coat. 

Approaching her, I gently shouted, "Where's Home?" She jumped. It was like the dear woman begging for help never expected anyone to actually help her. 

Lord, forgive us. 

Without any pomp and circumstance I simply offered her my coat, the money, and a prayer for God to get her home safely. I walked away after receiving her big hug, just as the tears began to form in her tired eyes. 

My husband teased me when we got home that it didn't even shock him - my giving away my expensive coat without a thought. He sees all my weakness and all the times I fail to follow Christ the way I desire to, but my man also knows that when I am most abandoned to Christ, I am also the most unpredictable. Because the work of the Holy Spirit is unpredictable. He is less about us giving when its comfortable from abundance, and more about us obeying in the moment to give what He’s already given us. 

God put a stop to my wrestling that morning by reminding me that He has placed me where He wants me, and He will use me how He wants to.

I get this wrong a lot. I confuse myself with a longing for more to give more. But God doesn't ask us to give from what we wish we had, He asks us to give from what He’s already given us to accomplish what He calls us to. 

The more I surrender to Jesus, the more I see firsthand that a wild, fulfilling life with Jesus is not about the Why or the Where or the What that we tend to grasp for. He doesn't need us to be in a different place, as a different person, living a different life. He will use us right now. He is here. Now. 

If we’ll listen in the places that he positions us, wherever that is, the adventures with Him will be endless. 

Tara is her name. She is trying to get to Billings Montana. What a priceless treasure she is. If I could do it over, I’d tell her that she is brave. I tell her that she is beautiful. And I’d tell her that the world needs to hear her voice and her story, because she matters. 

And so do you. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Prayer

Father, forgive us for allowing our hurting people to not expect help when they ask. Open our hearts to love the least of these. The ones you've placed right in front of us. 

Forgive us for praying to you for help, never expecting our prayers to be answered. Help our faith rise up to believe in you, the God who loves us and hears every prayer. May we believe you for the miracles we pray for, and even more. 

Father, forgive us for longing to be somewhere else, someone else and something else than what you've willed. We surrender to your will and find JOY in the place that you've planted us. 

Use us. Restore the broken in us. Renew us. And make us into the iron pillar of faith-filled, Holy Spirit led people you made us to be. 

In the name of Jesus Christ whose blood ransomed us, Amen. 

My 7-day Pledge {to Purge My Heart and Protect My Destiny}

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses so that Christ's power may rest on me. 

2 Corinthians 12:9

Relaxed under the warmth of my soothing detox bath, it felt strange to feel heavy. After all, water is a place we usually feel lighter in weight, not heavier. 

But it wasn't my body that felt weighted. It was my heart. And hearts don’t follow rules of buoyancy.

Placing my book on the nearby stand I whispered to the Lord through confused lips, “Why do I feel this way?” 

Jesus responded to my heart in a word that flooded all understanding to my soul…Gluttony.

Oh how instantly my heart knew He intended that word to embody more than just the overindulgence of food. 

The thing about gluttony is that it seeps into all areas of our lives before we realize it. Then suddenly we feel the weight of disconnection and we long to know why. All the while, Jesus waits for us to turn our hearts back to self-discipline and an armored way of living. 

Longing for more of Jesus took over my senses. The hot tears began to stream and I cried, Anything. I will give up anything to be nearer to you and free from the sin of gluttony. Show me how. Give me clarity in the steps to take. And help me Jesus to do it.”

“Purge Chelsia.”

Jesus is so gentle but so honest with us. 

I know my heart well enough to know that some seasons of life require soft growth where God is working on growing me more silently in the unseen places of my being. Then there are times in which He asks me to take a stronger stand by harshly removing and replacing with the guidance of his strong, loving hand. 

God's dreams are big for you and me but the war waged against our souls by our enemy is big too, so we must keep our eyes open wide. 

The devil prowls around like a lion only to devour us. He saturates our culture and allures us with temptations of laziness, distraction, and even numbness to our own sin. 

But our mighty God waits tirelessly for us to choose His way of preparing and growing and nurturing our hearts and lives in order to live more fully. 

Wisdom is teaching me that adopting an eternal perspective is the only passage-way to fully living in the fullness of those God-sized dreams. Because short-sightedness is the friend of our enemy but grand vision is the friend of our Savior. 

And so dear sisters, I share with you my 7 day battle plan to purge in order to protect my destiny, my marriage, and my family. 

Just as going through my closet is far less productive without a purpose, so going through the closet of our hearts and minds is less productive without a plan. Within each area as I seek to re-center and re-fill with life-giving replacements, I have kept a list of specific things that I need to abstain from or that I need to begin practicing.

Focusing on 3 areas to purge, I will: 1) Make a pledge and 2) Meditate on scripture that encourages my growth in these areas.  

This is not a one and done deal, for God is always calling us deeper. This is simply a launching pad - a step toward offering myself as a sacrifice and asking God to make me more like Him. 

3 Areas to Purge

1. Heart
2. Health
3. Habit

Pledge 

I pledge to take all thoughts captive. To release to God those harmful thoughts that I’ve kept in the dark. And instead of allowing toxic thoughts and actions to take residence in my heart I will choose edifying soul-food that builds me and the church. (2 Corinthians 10:5, Philippians 4:8)

I pledge to abstain from indulging in food and physical laziness that tears my body down. Instead I will choose substance and exercise that fuels me with energy and fosters a healthy lifestyle. By doing this I am pledging to take care of the temple God gave me therefore being better equipped to serve others and live in the freedom and fullness Jesus promises. (1 Corinthians 6:20, 1 Corinthians 3:16-17)

I pledge to re-direct my unhealthy habits that steal time, energy, and life from the people that matter most in my life. Turning from idol living that squelches living to the full. Instead I will choose to implement life-giving habits to establish balance and promote a life more reflective of godly character. I will honor the gifts God has given me by using them wisely.  (Romans 12:2, Luke 6:45, 1 Peter 4:10)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Going Deeper

1. What area from your own life came to your mind that you may need to purge?

 2. What holds you back from getting rid of gluttony-like living?

3. What step can you take today to walk toward a more free life??

How to change the world - RISE UP CHURCH - it begins with you

The church bells ring but there is no sound. 

For the sound of freedom, of powerful light and truth and love is within you and I.

Not the towering steeple. 

Jesus hung on the cross to show us what it looks like to be love in front of the world for the world. He was not crucified quietly in the dark with no witness. He chose exposure to the world. The temple shook, the veil torn, the whole world aware of his earth-shaking, his life-quaking power. 

He did that so that you and I would, so that we could, live the same bold life. 

He came as love. But he was not a quiet coward. Love. Truth. They are loud. Superior to darkness. Love and truth outweigh darkness ten-fold. 

But not if hidden in the bodies of Jesus people.  Because the power within us is the mightiest force ever in existence. But only when we choose to hang on a cross as Jesus did. Not literally - for Jesus did that for us. No. We need to hang our pride, our selfishness and self-agendas and self-motivation and self-awareness and self-loathing and self-everything on the cross where Jesus laid himself. It is in the hanging place of self, the releasing of self, that the power within us will break free from us and change the world. 

Do you want to change the world? Then hang yourself on the cross with Jesus and live. 

Let the rising come like a flooding water. Like a tsunami of love and truth and abandoned living in order to give life to the world. 

“People get ready. Jesus is coming.” The lyrics to a song that have played over and over in my heart this weekend. I believe those words. I believe God is rising up the hearts of his faithful servants around the world because he is coming. 

While the world forms strategy to overcome the evil, I believe there is only one way to win this war against violence and evil.

“For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.”  Ephesians 6:12

The battle is not for lives - it is for souls. 

It’s never been about world power. It’s about a spiritual agenda. 

It’s not against Christians - It is the devil fighting against God. We are just the attempted pawns.

Remember that the “thing” fought for is almost never the “thing” it’s really about. Because at the end of this life we’ll all see that the battle really was raging in the spiritual realm. And the enemy was just trying to distract us - to take our eyes off Jesus. 

But take heart church! For “you are all children of the light and children of the day. We do not belong to the night or to the darkness.” (1 Thessalonians 5:5)

Rise up! Rise up to fight for the souls of man you were made to fight for. 

Not with weapons of this world. But fight this way…

1. As one body. Ephesians 4:1-6
2. Counting everything a loss compared to knowing Jesus. Pursuing him above all else. Philippians 3:7-11
3. With the fruit of the spirit. Galatians 5:22-26
4. Fully trusting that Gods grace is sufficient for you, and his power is made perfect in your weakness. 2 Corinthians 12:9
5. Study love and live it shamelessly, offensively and profoundly. 1 Corinthians 13:1-13
6. As free children of God, free of FEAR! Romans 8:15-17
7. Believing that God is for us, we are more than conquerors through him and nothing can separate us from his love. Romans 8:31-39
8. Putting on the armor of Christ all day long. Ephesians 6:10-20

And then church - we will see the light explode in the darkness. It must begin in us first. Then the spirit of God will overflow through us and his power will overtake us and our land. 

He is mighty to save. 

He is ready to save. 

He is waiting for us to hand the world the greatest gift they’ll ever know. 

WILL YOU RISE UP?

Will you rise up in your place, wherever you are right now? Will you be the change in the world by allowing the power of God to permeate the world through you?

Will you rise up?

No matter the cost. Putting aside your view of yourself and believing that God has made you for such a time as this.

Will you rise up? 

And trust that God’s perfect plan for this universe actually wrote you in the story because he longs to know you and love you and love others through you.

Will you rise up?

By waking up. And abandon your safe, numb-faith for one that actually looks like Jesus. 

Will you rise up?

By grabbing hold of the fire of God within you and allowing it to change the world.

Rise. Up. Church. For God's glory is at stake. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you answered yes but don’t know what to do next...

First, you must believe that Jesus died for you to cleanse you of your sins. (Read Romans 3:23) He then rose again to conquer death so that you can live eternally with him. (Read Romans 6:23) Repent by asking him to forgive you. Then believe that his love for you is everlasting and never changing. Ask him to be Lord of your life. (Read Romans 10:9) Now trust that you are a new creation in him! (Read 2 Corinthians 5:17) Commit to following him and having relationship with him and believe that your loving God wants nothing less and nothing more than to be with you. (Read Romans 8:38-39)

If you answered yes and have already committed your life Jesus....

Fall on your knees and honestly repent of all your sin because that is what separates us from God. With your Bible open, and a heart ready to live more boldly for Jesus, ask God to show you what he desires from you. Then believe that he made you for more than mediocre christian living. He will speak to your heart because he made you for this. 

Are You Building the Wrong House?

“Unless the LORD builds the house, the builders labor in vain.” 

Psalm 127:1-2 (NIV)

The toiling in our lives can amount to much. 

Or it can amount to nothing mountable at all. 

Imagine waking up one morning and realizing that you missed it. The life you’d dreamed of filled with the fullness of joy and all things that make a soul sing, just passed by. 

We all ache to make something of our lives. To build purpose from our existence and leave behind a noteworthy legacy. 

But what if we’re laboring night and day only to turn up empty on our results?

Back in high school I excitedly announced that I planned to attend beauty school. As a child I played with old-fashioned-cone-hair-dryers and fake hair spray for more hours than I can count. I loved the work of making women feel beautiful. 

But some of my friends crushed me with their opinion that beauty-work is not “Christian enough” work. 

I didn't attend beauty school for other reasons, but those words festered in me for years. They bothered me. They temporarily tainted my view of what is considered holy work. 

Over the years God gifted me new lenses to see that when Jesus is involved, all work is holy.

Just as the sunrise awakens the world each morning, so our gifts awaken the world to see Jesus. 

Jesus uses your gifts, your passions, your dreams, to make you into an artist that sings of His glory just by being who He made you to be. Just as He is intentional with painting the beautiful sky each morning, so He is intentional about the work you were made to do. 

What the Lord creates of our lives is artful-beauty. He brushes his supernatural against our natural and makes it something miraculous.

No work is too small if Jesus is at the helm. 

But when we leave Jesus out of the equation and choose selfish gain over surrendered living, we lose out on the gift of our natural work miraculously becoming His supernatural work. 

The greatest heartache of this life will not be about missed promotions or a messy home or a lack of time to commit to more. The greatest heartache of our life would be to devote our lives to building our own kingdom and miss the gift of Jesus’ very presence in our lives.

Dear sisters, let’s not toil for a home we were never meant to build. Let’s, together, lay down our vain-tools and pick up the ordained-tools we are meant to work with. Toiling daily to build a home that is hand-stamped by Jesus. 

For that is the most beautiful legacy of all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Going Deeper

1. What house are you building now? Yours? Or God's?

2. What natural work were you made to do? 

(Hint: The things that make you feel alive and fulfilled)

3. How can use those natural gifts to allow God to do supernatural work ?